Lohan: a method to her madness |
Los Angeles, California Lindsay Lohan walked out of the LA courthouse earlier today with a big smile on her face even though she had just been sentenced to a 90 day stay in a lock-up rehab facility. When asked why the 26 year old actress was grinning so much she replied, "I just can't hold it in anymore. I'm stepping out of character for only five minutes, but OMG! I am going to star in the biggest movie next year. It's called The Addict."
Ms Lohan revealed that she had been utilizing the techniques found in Method acting, where the performer submerges his or her personality completely into the role. Lindsay's supposed troubles with the law, drug use, and repeated stays at rehab were all in preparation for the upcoming movie.
"Some people may think that taking six years to prepare for a role is over-the-top. Those people are not serious about acting, and probably not serious about anything in their own lives," Ms. Lohan gasped as she made for her vehicle to take one more trip to the clubs for some naughty behavior before her sentence began.
She reassured her steadfast fans that she was perfectly OK, and that she only wished to shatter her superstar image and transform herself into an Oscar-worthy actress extraordinaire.
When asked about the car crashes and failed drug tests, Ms Lohan simply stated, "I really got into this role. How can I become the addict in The Addict without engaging in a little car crashing and illicit drug use? I'm not a real addict. I can stop at any time. Think of me as addict-lite, not addict-heavy."
Marie Kannard, Lindsay's publicist, was contacted and confirmed the seemingly bizarre reason for Lohan's bizarre beahvior. The Addict had been stuck in preoduction hell for years, leaving the starlet with no other choice but to keep up with her Method training.
*This story is a fake, fake, fake, fake.