Judge Christopher Lopez approved an order that attorneys for Jones, his media company and the Sandy Hook families had all agreed to. The order lifts a stay that automatically halted the cases when Jones filed for bankruptcy. Free Speech Systems, Jones’ media company, is also seeking bankruptcy protection.
Lopez approved the order, which prevents the families from pursuing collection efforts, during an hour and a half long hearing that Jones attended remotely.
Sensing that the court of public opinion is against him, Jones' public relation specialist, Andrew Canard, recommended that he reach out to reality shows and see if he could be a contestant. The Biggest Loser said Yes!
The Biggest Loser is a weight loss show where contestants change their lives and shed the pounds. However, there are people managing the show who believe that Jones will be the biggest loser even if he doesn't lose any weight.
"The production team at The Biggest Loser told me Jones was the perfect candidate, Mr. Canard said. "He has fantastic name recognition and legions of viewers will be hoping he gets a heart attack or stroke out during the show."
Alex Jones insists he doesn't need to lose weight and all of his access pounds are "100% USA beefcake."
In related news, The One Ring destroys Sam Bankman-Fried and effective altruism.
